IN modern world more and more often you can meet people suffering from loneliness. If you also lack good friends, then it's time to think about why this is happening. Maybe it's time to change your social life and meet some interesting people that you might call your own in the future. best friends. How to make new friends as an adult?
Having comrades is necessary not only in order to have someone to go to the cinema with, sit in a cafe, tell stories from life or share your thoughts. Friends are the support and connections that are sometimes so necessary for all of us. An interesting study was conducted at Harvard, which showed that people who do not have friends are 2 times more likely to die an untimely death. This is the same as if you were bringing your death closer by smoking 15 cigarettes a day. Another reason to think about finding true comrades.
There is a stereotype in society that you can make friends only while you are young, and as you age, it becomes more and more difficult to make friends. But this is just another misconception, because if you know exactly what kind of people you want to see as your friends, then their search becomes much easier. In fact, making new friends is a fairly simple task, but only if you are open to new acquaintances. Below are six useful tips how to make new friends for an adult, following which you can make new acquaintances.
1. Be welcoming and friendly
It is the first impression in most cases that is the decisive factor in determining whether a person will continue to communicate with you. So work on your facial expressions. You probably remember all these sad and unfriendly faces that you can see every day in public transport, queues at a store or bank.
You don’t even want to approach a person with such an expression on his face, let alone start a conversation. But their facial expressions do not mean at all that they are evil and unfriendly, appearance very often misleading. If you want people to reach out to you, smile more often, even a simple nod of your head will show the person that you are ready to communicate.
In addition to a friendly facial expression, one should also not forget about such an important skill as the ability to listen to the interlocutor. Yes, you can have a lot in stock interesting stories that you can't wait to tell. But friendly relations involve reciprocity and active dialogues in which both interlocutors participate. Therefore, learn to listen with interest to what others tell you, maybe this is what will help you find a good friend.
2. Take up your favorite hobby
One of the most reliable and proven ways to make new friends is to make acquaintances based on common hobbies. Almost every person has one to whom he likes to devote his free time. Most often, people do it alone, but why not go somewhere where you can meet people who share your passion? In social networks, it is very easy to find interest groups in which people gather who are ready for new acquaintances and communication.
It is much easier to have a conversation with someone who is interested in the same things as you. Common topics for a conversation - this is a great beginning of friendship, so if you meet such a person, then be sure to continue communication with him.
3. Be positive
It is much easier for an adult to make new friends when they are positive rather than looking at the world from a pessimistic point of view. Few people want to spend time with a person who sees only the bad and ignores the good. Try to imagine how people see you from the outside.
Do they like talking to you? Would you like to have a conversation with yourself? Objectively evaluate all your positive and negative qualities, and then . If you want your communication with other people to always remain positive, then follow these simple rules: smile more often, do not forget, support in difficult situations, do not lie, ask questions.
When one negative comes from a person, people prefer to avoid his company. In the course of a social experiment, it was found that if you speak well of people, then others begin to think of you as well. For example, if in a conversation with colleagues you call your boss a well-mannered and friendly person, then most likely they will begin to think that you yourself are very well-mannered and friendly. The same thing happens when you talk bad about someone. This will only lead to the fact that others will consider you not a very good person.
4. Don't be afraid to take the first step
Some people think that taking the first step is to show weakness, to show your vulnerability. Maybe you are also one of those who are afraid to be the first to start an acquaintance. But in reality, the person you want to meet may be even more shy and withdrawn than you. If you tell him a couple of phrases, nothing bad will happen, and suddenly this very step will help you find a friend.
Everything that makes friendship so valuable is built on mutual trust and giving. For example, good relations will not work if only one of the friends will keep secrets, support in difficult situations, and be a reliable support. Each of these rules must be followed by both parties.
Another great way to make friends is to help those in need. If you help a person cope with his problem, he will see in you someone who can become a good friend.
Do not sit still and hope that people will start to get to know you. Start showing at least some activity. For example, invite your friends for a walk, sit in a cafe or go to the movies. Many of them, just like you, want to spend time in good company and make new interesting acquaintances.
5. Keep in touch with new acquaintances
The more time we spend with people, the closer they become to us. If, for example, you met someone at a party and you liked the person, then offer to follow each other on social networks or just exchange numbers. You can immediately arrange the next meeting. If you do not do this in the next few days after meeting, then calling a person and inviting him to a meeting in a few weeks or months will be extremely strange.
6. Always agree if you are invited to spend time together.
People who easily make new acquaintances accept almost all invitations, since any event or meeting is another chance to meet interesting people. You should not refuse when you are called somewhere, even if you have no desire to go somewhere. Suddenly, at one of these meetings, something amazing will happen to you that can radically change your life.
You just need to overcome your own and get out of your comfort zone, leave such a cozy apartment and go towards new interesting acquaintances. This is how you can make new friends as an adult.
Each person has his own goals in life, temperament and talents. However, all people, without exception, need support and friendship, no matter what. Everyone needs someone with whom you can talk heart to heart and at the same time be confident in the sincerity of the interlocutor. How to make friends? How to find those who will be there even in difficult times?
Many may say that this gives them a family. It’s hard to argue with this, but still friends occupy a special place in the life of every person. And for some, they become more significant than relatives.
Some may argue that, and really believe in it. But, most likely, these are people who were simply unlucky with friends in the past, and they faced betrayal or insincerity from those who were highly trusted and loved very much. In this case, only one piece of advice can be given. You should not be disappointed and withdraw into yourself, you need to look for those who will be truly devoted to you and highly value friendship and close relationships, just like you.
As a rule, there are not many true comrades. Usually there are no more than five of them, the very ones with whom you can talk about everything and get support, who will rush at any time of the day or night, no matter what happens. Such friendship is not tested in days or even weeks, it takes a lot of time, months, years. It is built on experienced joys and troubles, actions and common interests. There are not many such friends, and they are already perceived as relatives, as family members. Often these are those with whom they have known since childhood or since their student days.
But how can one explain the fact that some have many friends and they easily converge with other people, quickly find a common language? The thing is that no matter what you do, wherever you work and whatever you do, there will always be others who have the same interests. In addition, friendship is usually formed naturally, it cannot be built artificially, as it does not tolerate coercion and insincerity.
What to do to have many friends
It is impossible to unequivocally answer the question: "How to make friends?". There is no established algorithm for this. We are all living people with our own characteristics of character, mindset and habits, often “on our minds”. There are only a few practical advice, which will help to establish relationships with others and find among them a "soul mate". Most of them are aimed at developing oneself as a person.
- Think positively and trust people. If you are set to fail from the very beginning, then chances are that this is exactly what will happen. You can’t see a catch in every action of others or expect that you will be deceived or betrayed again, if this has already happened.
- Learn to take the first step: contact people with a request, write messages, show all kinds of initiative, etc. If you wait until they want to meet or talk with you, then you can spend the whole time, not to mention making new ones.
- Engaging in self-development is useful for yourself and can be useful in communicating with others: it will be easier to find a topic for conversation. Moreover, others are interested in learning something new, so it is likely that you will interest the interlocutor, and then he will want to continue to communicate with you.
- Develop self-confidence. It is always nice to communicate with someone who knows what he is worth and what he wants, and can also defend himself and defend his opinion.
- Be sincere. Even the closest and longest relationships destroy lies and pretense. In addition, it is unlikely that you will enjoy being someone else and living someone else's life.
And, of course, the most important thing is not to be afraid to communicate, look for new opportunities for dating: sign up for courses foreign languages, go to the gym, etc. At the same time, it is important to remember that you should not be intrusive, as this may scare some people away. Friendship is something that is built gradually and painstakingly, without haste and excessive effort, everything should go naturally.
But with all this, it is important to always remember that you can’t change yourself and do what you don’t like just to get to know someone or build relationships. Since it is impossible to understand how, if you start communication with deception.
Be who you are, develop, learn new things. There will always be those who have the same interests and outlook on life. Whatever your passion, in any industry and field, you will meet a lot of people with whom you will have something to talk about. This may develop into a .
Where to find friends
You can meet interesting people anywhere: at work, in a fitness club, at school, etc. Moreover, the most remarkable and surprising thing is that in most cases, when you first meet a person, you cannot even assume that you will find a common language and will communicate closely. Basically, a lot of new acquaintances and friends appear, but you won’t get it so easily and quickly. This is a matter of time and, oddly enough, patience and work.
Of course, you don’t need to break yourself and your personality, but you should try to be more tolerant, friendlier and start being interested in others. Then the question of how to make friends will cease to torment you. Even in a public place or transport, a person who speaks politely evokes more positive emotions and a desire to get to know you than someone who is rude or withdrawn.
Theoretically, you can talk to absolutely anyone, find common interests and make many new friends. In the company, at parties, on vacation and in the hospital, there is an opportunity to make friends, if there is a desire.
It often happens that having met somewhere fleetingly, you learned very little about a person, but you liked him, you would like to continue communicating with him. Now almost anyone can be found on the Internet, through social networks, and with a lack of information - through groups and special communities.
No need to be shy - try, communicate. It is necessary to look for opportunities to meet, keep in touch with friends, since now this can be done easily using the Internet and telephone. There are practically no barriers to find the one you need and talk to him, not just hear the voice, but see the face and emotions.
Friends in social networks
This is a separate category of friends, which is worth mentioning. In order to find them, you do not need to make any special efforts: just exchange a couple of phrases in messages and click the "add" button. But in most cases, this is done to surprise everyone with the number of their friends, but not the quality of the relationship with them.
The bulk of these new “friends” are those whom you have never seen in your life, former or current classmates, classmates, etc. And there are only a few truly close people among them. Often those who are shy or afraid to do it in social networks communicate in social networks. real life. It is easier for them to talk about anything, without looking at the person in the face and without seeing his reaction. Therefore, unfortunately, many are now online. This peculiar illusion of freedom does not give anything but a feeling of even greater loneliness, and the desire to communicate with real people disappears. The more often a person spends time on social networks, the worse he manages to contact others outside the Internet.
However, there are cases when, starting to communicate with a completely stranger who lives thousands of kilometers away from you, you find exactly the one you have been dreaming of for so long - a true friend. But correspondence is not enough to fully know a friend and his interests. Therefore, it is important to meet in person and develop relationships through communication.
For this reason, even social networks can come in handy for those who decide to find. In this matter, you need to use any means of communication, look for interest groups, ask people about what interests you, and not be afraid that you will be misunderstood. Be self-confident and optimistic, then they will want to maintain acquaintance and conversation with you.
In order to understand how to learn how to make friends, you need to be a holistic person, feel others, support them, be able to listen and hear. In any relationship, especially in friendship, it is impossible only to accept or use people for your own purposes. Sooner or later it will end, and you won’t get real comrades that way either. To be worthy, you need to sincerely open yourself to other people and trust them.
Hello dear readers! Would you like to make friends? Congratulations, this means that you are not standing in one place, but only constantly moving forward. We can immediately say that if you decide to seriously do this, then you will have to, frankly speaking, sweat. But in any case, no matter how you evaluate yourself, each person will definitely find his friend, or girlfriend. Work hard for a few simple reasons:
- You need to change (if you already think that you don’t need it, then read the “second” part at the very end of the post).
- You have to move a lot.
1. Let's focus on the first point. What motivated you to take action to achieve the wonderful goal of making friends? Simply because you are not satisfied with your current position. It may be that all your friends admire you, but they themselves are dissatisfied with such an environment. But why did you just wake up, and not much earlier? You had no experience, no sharp mind. There is nothing wrong with this, everything can be fixed.
2. So, starting to work on yourself, carefully review all your old views. And if you admit to yourself that there are still things in the world that you do not understand at all, then immediately stop and try to study the issue with maximum vigilance. Remember that the key to success can only be in yourself.
3. All people, without exception, are interested in communicating with an interesting interlocutor. So what's stopping you from being one? Just plain indecisiveness. By all means make it so that it would be pleasant to communicate with you on any popular topics. After all, many beautiful successful people just not enough communication. But what if you talk fieryly with such a person? Yes, he will not let you go. Will always ask for your advice. Is it bad? Do not take a couple of days to write down everything point by point, where and how you would like to become more attractive.
4. Let's turn to the second point. Know that in order to somehow win the trust of people, you need to move a lot. Here is a stranger in front of you, you are attracted to him by some amazing forces. And what will you do? That's right, invite him to various places, phone calls. For example, to lead a person to a house. Why not a sport? Needless to say, it's just a simple walk. This is, above all, precious, golden fellowship. Thanks to him, you can make friends with a person, and forever remain in his memory.
Many now supporters have divorced the opinion that it is not at all necessary to have a serious, trust-based relationship with anyone. "Let them rely only on themselves," they say. But excuse me, a person lives in society, and as a biological, unique species, he needs to receive information. From whom else, except people. Yes, of course, you can read a great variety of literature, but when the language is idle, you should not expect fast, excellent results.
What to do to make new friends.
Visit public places where there are people, but not in such a large number, compared to the audience of a huge stadium. Start small, get big. Get used to large quantities gradually. Thus, one can become liberating. And your awkwardness with a new acquaintance will disappear. Make friends like this:
Try to find a person who is of interest to you.
Do you want to get to know him? It's easier than ever. Look at how he is dressed. Suddenly, he is wearing the same sunglasses that you recently wanted to buy. Why not ask him for advice, ask what their quality is. Most likely, he will tell about them with a brilliant desire. During the conversation, smile as naturally as possible, and try to make a favorable impression. How to do it? Ask counter questions, sincerely and passionately interested. Keep your word. Just do not forget to know the norm, otherwise a stranger may think that you want from him, first of all, his money, look for fleeting benefits. In our turbulent times, you can think of anything.
Find "unlucky" people.
In no way am I advocating contacting . Find those people who currently need help. I am sure that among a hundred people, at least one needs help. Perhaps they stumbled from you in the region of one hundred meters, dropped the bag, scattered securities in passing. Immediately, without an idea, rush to help. No one is able to convey the feelings that a person receives when he sees a person who, with all his kindness and impatience, extends a helping hand. That's it, the person will remain your faithful and most remarkable friend. Go ahead, with the most cheerful smile, try to try this method on yourself at least once!
Part two.
It happens that you treat people with great respect, respect, but they completely ignore you. Do not under any circumstances assume that it is you. You can be very good, smart, dexterous. It's just that you haven't met those people who could appreciate you. Search. And find your circle of friends in which you will feel extremely happy.
If you are already a formed personality, then just get to know yourself better, try to look at yourself from a completely different side. Believe in yourself, play in your imagination prosperous moments.
Absolutely everyone is given a chance to make more friends. How you dispose of them is up to you.
With respect, Nicholai.
New acquaintances, new friends, it is always a lot of impressions and you learn a lot of new things. But how to make friends in an unfamiliar place, how to join a new group of friends? How to become your own among people completely unfamiliar to you before?
How to make friends at school
For almost every child entering a new class, this situation is stressful. It is not easy for children to experience such moments in life. First, the child must find friends.
How to make friends at school is what occupies his mind. It is understandable, it is more difficult to experience difficulties and joys alone. Here are some tips for a child:
First of all, you need to pay attention to your erudition, you must become interesting person, with you should be interesting and entertaining. Read more books, watch informative scientific films, programs.
Make it so that there is something to talk about with you, otherwise it’s probably not interesting to talk with a person who knows nothing and cannot even connect two words.
To make friends at school, try to be natural and cultured, there is nothing good about smoking and drinking among schoolchildren, even if it is fashionable. This is complete nonsense, and whoever does this is just trying to look older, but in fact it looks more like childish, when he grows up he will puzzle over how to quit smoking.
And by the way, girls do not like kissing people who smoke, they love more guys who lead a healthy and sporty lifestyle. And the one who tries to prove to you that smoking and alcohol is good, he just slows down in his development.
Go in for sports, this will give your body strength and harmony, it will inspire respect among classmates, hooligans will avoid you, and in the sports section you have a chance to make friends at school among decent guys who lead a healthy and correct lifestyle.
Try to communicate more with your classmates, learn more about them, be interested in their affairs, think maybe you have common interests, this will bring you closer and help you make new friends.
Try to study well. Not just to make friends at school, but for your future. People who study well in our time achieve a lot in life. For some reason, there is a stereotype in schools that the one who studies well is that "nerd" or something like that, it rather comes from envy and from the illiteracy and narrow-mindedness of those people who say so. Gone are the days when former Losers by force seized the business and became rich people.
Always be decent in everything, and always be fair and honest. Never lie, it is better to evade the answer than to deceive someone.
How to make friends when you're new
This is not such a simple question, someone easily makes new acquaintances, but there are people for whom this is all very difficult and difficult. And there are many situations in which we have to join a new company in our life. This may be a change of residence, moving to another city. It could be new job, with new employees. This may be a new class for the student. Here are some tips on how to make friends if you're new:
Be always friendly and keep open, smile more often. To make friends, if you're new, try to never lie or throw words to the wind. Never promise to do what you can't deliver. Don't pretend to be someone you really aren't. Otherwise, sooner or later the whole truth will be in sight, and you will look in the most unfavorable light, and new friends may turn away from you.
Show that you are ready for a new acquaintance, be open. Show interest in the habits and activities of new friends, find out what they are interested in, just do not be too intrusive, if you see that your questions annoy the interlocutors, then it would be better to switch to another topic.
Be friendly and always ready to help, only in this situation you need to notice the line between real help and whim. Because it's possible to go from helper to errand boy, it will lower your reputation with new acquaintances and also lower your self-esteem. Know how to refuse if the requests of new acquaintances run counter to your principles, interests, and do not infringe on your dignity.
Once in a new team, try to strengthen your new acquaintances and support the initiative to go together to some institution. And also feel free to suggest a hike somewhere, take the initiative, so to speak.
To make friends, if you are new, try to force yourself not to be shy, not to be embarrassed, because they are the same people as you, and the only thing that distinguishes them from you is that they have known each other for a long time. You have a goal to get to know them, and you will definitely achieve it.
If you have any talent or ability, or maybe an unusual hobby, share it with new friends, only without a tone of superiority, this causes dissatisfaction with others.
How to make new friends with interests
Now in our information age, each of us probably wondered how to make new friends of interest? It's quite simple, if you have your own hobby and a computer connected to the Internet, then finding friends who will share your interests is not at all difficult.
So, let's start with the most important and necessary:
First you need to choose a hobby, what would you like to do in your free time. Many people like to play sports, for example, and choose tennis, volleyball, football, skiing, badminton, hockey or dancing as their hobby. Or, for example, you like to do needlework or maybe you love nature and want to take care of plants, animals.
In any case, if you want to make new friends, the main task for you is to get out of your apartment and find a person who likes the same as you. In this case, acquaintances can be made quickly and in the future you will have a good reason for meeting.
Take a closer look at your neighbors in the porch or yard. You will definitely need to get to know them better. Maybe among them there is someone who shares your interests and this will be a big plus in relationships with people who you have been living next to for so many years. In any case, it won't hurt.
It is also possible to make new friends at school or at work. If you study or work with a person for a long time, you can get to know him better. In addition to work and study, there are courses for learning foreign languages, courses for professional development: any training that lasts a long time can hold people together for many years. In the future, you can help each other in moving up the career ladder and spend leisure time pleasantly together.
There are many different forums and blogs on the Internet now, and you can write posts on the topic that interests you the most. Even if your interests are very original and exclusive, you can certainly find many sites where people who are equally passionate about the hobby communicate.
To begin with, in order to make new friends of interest, you can only communicate on a forum or blog, exchange experience and knowledge, and then organize a meeting for forum users. I think that it will be very interesting for you to communicate in real non-virtual life, since everyone has already created a mental image of his interlocutor during online communication.
Such friendship will undoubtedly be very strong, you will be able to talk online every day with your friends, often there is simply not enough time for real meetings.
