All people lie. Someone more often, someone less often, some do it clumsily and give themselves away very quickly, while others are “professional” liars who can even deceive a polygraph (lie detector). How to expose a liar?

A person learns to lie in childhood. At the age of about four years, children are already quite clever at deception. Perhaps the only “plus” of a lie is that it is a sign of a fairly well-developed intellect, because a lie is a chain of logical operations combined with acting skills. You must first come up with something to say in order to hide the truth and not give out deceit, and then also arrange a “one-man theater”.

According to statistics lie more often men, women also deceive a lot, but more often than men, they are ashamed of it. Unfortunately, most people lie to their loved ones and relatives.

No one wants to be caught lying, but everyone would be glad to learn to notice the deceit of the interlocutor. The ability to see lies is undoubtedly very useful. Nobody wants to be deceived, seduced, insulted, humiliated and disappointed by a deceiver.

Lie- This is a deliberately expressed and not true statement. There are a huge number of types of lies: from children's fairy tales and lies for good to perjury and pathological lies. Whatever the lie, and no matter how skillful the liar is, one way or another, he imperceptibly betrays himself.

When a person lies, he behaves in a special way, not as it is characteristic of him, tense and feigned. There are verbal and non-verbal signs of a lie common to all people, and there are also those that can be detected only by observing a specific person and studying his behavior sufficiently.

It is the care and observation behind a person will help to recognize lies in his words or deeds. With age, it is easier to detect deception, as sufficient life experience has been accumulated to analyze and compare people's behavior. There are also people who have a well-developed intuition and therefore skillfully sense a lie.

Everyone can learn to recognize lies by certain signs. But it's not as easy as it might seem at first glance. The main difficulty lies in the fact that any excitement.

A simple example: the intensity of the physiological reaction of salivation in the oral cavity is lowered when a person is lying, but it is also lowered when a person is simply worried (they say “the mouth is dry”).

IN Ancient China knew about the connection of experiences and physiological reactions. In those days, the accused of a crime was asked to put a handful of dry rice flour in his mouth, after which the accusation was read to him. If after that he spit out a wet ball of flour, the charge was dropped, if the lump remained dry and it was not possible to spit it out completely, the person was found guilty.

Now no one judges so recklessly on one single sign of a lie. Lies are complex complex various reactions.

Deceivers think about how to lie verbally and at the same time portray right emotions on the face. The deception is carefully hidden, but still it can be seen by some signs.

When identifying true emotions, you need to focus on facial expressions and look for inconsistencies. A lie is visible when the emotion is untimely (appears after the words, not before they are pronounced), prolonged (lasting more than five seconds, in the case of surprise - more than one second) and asymmetric (for example, when smiling, one corner of the lips is lowered and the other is raised) .

Micro facial expressions are the most sincere signs of a lie, but since they only last about a quarter of a second, they are very, very difficult to notice. But it is quite possible to notice dual emotions lasting one second or more. These are emotions that are dismantled on purpose and controlled by the mind, but true, consciously uncontrolled emotions “break through” through them.

A fake smile is the easiest to recognize, because almost all the stars and models on billboards, in magazines and on the TV screen smile like this: they smile only with their lips, stretch the smile, exposing their teeth, while their eyes remain wide open and without a single wrinkle. A sincere smile is different in that not only the mouth smiles, but also the eyes, they squint by raising the cheekbones, and “crow's feet” appear in the outer corners.

Some people, while uttering a lie, look intently into the eyes, as if trying to hypnotize the interlocutor, while the latter, on the contrary, hide their eyes. Most often, when inventing information, a person looks to the right, and remembering the truth - to the left. Dilated pupils and frequent blinking can also be signs of deception.

1. Vegetative(due to the work of the autonomic nervous system):
   • cardiopalmus,
   • rapid breathing,
   • increased sweating,
   • decreased salivation,
   • redness of the skin,
   • increased blood pressure and others.

So, in order to correctly interpret human behavior, everything must be taken into account: speech, facial expressions, gestures, physiology. It is easy to be deceived when detecting deception! Therefore, you should never rush to conclusions and offend a person with guesses (especially if relations with him are expensive), it is better to continue observing until the deception becomes clear.

Peculiar mini test is a simple trick. It will consist in a sharp change in the topic of conversation. If a person is happy about the change of topic, relaxes and relief is reflected on his face, most likely he had to work hard before this, hiding the truth.

Another mini test. You need to ask the interlocutor to retell everything he said in reverse order, that is, in sequence from the end to the beginning. A liar is unlikely to be able to do this without mistakes.

Perhaps the biggest difficulty in exposing a liar is to remain an impartial, objective observer without getting emotionally involved. Often a person himself is glad to be deceived, to look "through his fingers" or "rose-colored glasses" at everything that the deceiver says or does.

Every person faces the concept of "lie" every day, because it is an integral phenomenon of communication.

Psychologists conducted an experiment, the results of which are simply amazing: during a conversation lasting about 10 minutes, 60% of people lie.

In the process of fighting the truth, delusion exposes itself.
Karl Marx

Lie or delusion?

Lies are told by children and adults, relatives, friends and unfamiliar people. The concept of " lie was first identified by Aristotle. According to the ancient scientist, if a statement unites what is in reality separated, or separates what is connected in reality, then it is false.

But can all information that does not correspond to reality be considered a lie? By definition, a lie is a distortion of the known truth, which is committed consciously and with a specific purpose. The key concept here, according to scientists, is precisely “conscious action”.

Which is worse, a lie or a delusion?

A person can assert something that does not correspond to the real state of affairs. In one situation, such behavior is interpreted as a deceit, and in another - as a delusion. What is the difference between these concepts?

Delusion is the content of consciousness, which does not correspond to reality, but is perceived by the individual as true. The man really believes in his words. He has no intention of misleading others. He believes that everything he says is true.
Delusion differs from lies and disinformation in that such a statement cannot be considered false, since it does not have a specific motive.

Psychologists define lies as a verbal psychosocial act of influencing another person, with the help of which an attempt is made to inspire the interlocutor with information that does not correspond to the truth.

The main signs of a lie are:

• presence of intention to deceive the interlocutor;
• full awareness that the information being expressed is not true;
• there must be the expediency of the action being performed: the desire to avoid undesirable consequences or to obtain a certain benefit due to the fact that the interlocutor believes what was said.

Lying is always an act of will. In the mind of a person who tells a lie, there are true and false ideas. Between them there is a struggle, as a result of which the person, pursuing his own goals, chooses deceit, and not the truth.

Read more about why all people lie.

The psychology of modern lies

Despite the fact that from childhood everyone is taught that it is not good to lie, starting from the age of three, a person begins to tell lies. Small child thus trying to avoid punishment. In adulthood, lies are often used to achieve their goals.

The choice is always yours. The main thing is to understand why you make such a choice. And this is possible only if there is an understanding of what a lie is, what it is and what it really brings.

Why is it so easy to fool me? This question is probably asked by thousands of people all over the world, once again falling for the bait of cheaters. How many were in the life of these deceptions: from childhood to the present day. Constantly the same thing: once again I am deceived, I am deceived. And once again, I give myself a vow - never again to believe in people, in honesty and decency. And again, and again - everyone deceives me. And it's easy, without any problems. Like a real sucker. Why? For what? Yes, after all, why do people lie?

• Why do people lie and deceive each other? After all, a lie is comparable to betrayal, the biggest crime...
• Why does everyone always lie to me? Why do I fall for deceit, although I have been taught many times by bad experience? Why am I once again deceived in a person in the same situations?
• Why does a person seem to be good, and then turn out to be the other way around? And why is it so painful to be deceived in a person?
• How to trust people? How to live and not be afraid to be deceived?

The world we live in is moving at super speeds. It is oversaturated with new technologies, a lot of people, a huge amount of information. It is very often difficult to keep up with all this, to run ahead of the locomotive. Often we feel ourselves at the very end, when we are dragged along and do not know where it can lead.

The situation is aggravated by the fact that there is a whole mass of people around who, for some reason, strive to deceive, cheat, and throw us away. We constantly find ourselves in situations where we lose faith in people, in best quality human, such as justice, honesty, the value of truth. How can you trust people when even in simple, primitive situations, we constantly get into embarrassment, where we are deceived. And so time after time, constantly, for many years.

I always buy eggs only in the market, on a proven tray, from a very good, kind saleswoman. Although the eggs are not homemade (because homemade eggs can be infected), these eggs are of better quality than store-bought ones. They are not artificial, and the yolk in them is yellow, and the protein is such a thick, good consistency. The way it really should be. What can I say - the eggs here are good, so the price is slightly higher than in other places. But they are very high quality!

And yesterday a glaring incident happened to me - I was once again deceived and I was once again deceived in a person! As always before my birthday, I went to the market to buy three dozen eggs and cook many delicious dishes. I was standing at the counter, waiting for my kind saleswoman to wrap the eggs, and then other buyers come up and ask: "Why is it so expensive?" And how can I prove to them that the eggs here are very, very, very good. And the yolk is yellow and the protein is correct, and in general! Because I always defend what is good and high quality. After all, it is very important that everything be fair, fair. But people did not buy anything and went to another tray. And the saleswoman packed the eggs so well - in a special tray for 30 pieces, and three more times with tape, and more with tape. I was sure that she did it for my convenience and THANKS for the zealous advertising from the bottom of her heart.

I come home, open it, and there are 6 broken eggs. Did you understand? She packed the eggs so well, not to thank, but to hide her deceit! How can you do that? How then to trust people?

And most importantly, a neighbor came to the light, and I told her about this incident. So she looked at my eggs and assured me that exactly the same company is sold in the store, and that they are just as good there, and that they are half the price. Why am I constantly deceived, why is it so easy to deceive me?

Even the smallest deceit is very bitter. But still it is not as painful as the big one. Of course, the situations in the store, in transport are sad, but tolerable. But similar situations occur in ordinary life. We are deceived in the closest to us, pleasant people. We are deceived at work, we are deceived at home, even by the people we love. We are deceived by husbands and wives, our own children and parents. How to live with it? How to trust people?

Who constantly cheats and who is often cheated?

First you need to understand the psychological nature of deception. Rounders, deceivers, thieves, dishonest people have always existed in the world, they have been known since ancient times. Severe penalties and punishments, such as cutting off a hand or a long prison term, could never eradicate the bad deeds of such people. What can we say about a little lie - this is a scourge that has existed always and everywhere. However, in order to understand the nature of deceit, it is necessary to look at it from the opposite side - that is, at absolute honesty and truth.

Only in this way, like black on white, can we identify the nature of the deception.

So, pure truth, comprehensive honesty - these are very important categories that are the main values ​​not for everyone, but for many people, namely, for the owners of the anal vector. This type of human personality by nature has an internal orientation to the truth. For them, honesty is like sacred, pure, correct, but lies, lies, deceit are like dirty, wrong, terrible. Such people themselves can never lie, even in critical situations, when the mind understands that it would be better to lie, they cannot open their mouths and tell a lie, it is simply beyond their strength. The honesty and truthfulness of anal people are innate qualities that have always been valued. They allow a person with an anal vector to achieve the desired honor and respect, because he has been working honestly all his life, not chasing ephemeral success. In a word, a real specialist in his field, a master or craftswoman of "golden hands".

But, as the other side of the coin, honesty and the value of truth become a real scourge for anal people. They themselves are unable to deceive, to say at least one word of untruth, they always buy into someone else's lies. Seeing a person, even an absolute liar and cheater, they trust him, as they trust themselves. Assessing others through themselves, at each new meeting they are unable to believe that it is possible to lie from three boxes, to deceive. It is anal people who at first strongly believe in people, and then they are deceived in people. And this is repeated all their lives, over and over again, because the innate credulity does not disappear anywhere. Of course, no one wants to be a sucker, and for some time after another deception, the anal person does not trust anyone, sits in resentment, but this happens only for a short time. Then he again falls for the same bait.

I am sitting in the "office" of a doctor of some kind of Tibetan medicine. He tells me that I have many diseases, chronic and incurable by conventional medicine. But non-traditional - what I need. I understand that something is wrong here, because the office of this so-called doctor is located in the city market and his neighbor on the right sells live fish, and the neighbor on the left sells jeans from Indonesia. I understand that the price of these medicines is exorbitant, they cannot cost so much even if they consisted entirely of gold. I understand that something is wrong here, that this is a scam. But after all, Lyudka, my Lyudka, a friend with whom I sat at the next table at my last job, said that she was cured of all her problems thanks to these drugs. She happened to meet me literally yesterday and immediately began to assure me that these are magical medicines that can be cured. Forever. And there will be no more pain, no more suffering. If she is cured, then so am I. And so I take out my wallet and pay this golden mountain, all my savings for the last six months, for this Tibetan garbage, which should also help me. And only later, at home, after 1-2 months, when the pain has not disappeared and no changes in the body are observed, I understand that I was deceived. Once again, I fell for a lie.

If a person, in addition to the anal vector, also has a visual one, then this very often aggravates the situation even more. A developed visual vector endows a person with such innate qualities as kindness, sympathy, pity, emotional openness. Communicating with any person, even with one whom he sees for the first time in his life, he is sure of the same kindness and on his part, thus, literally idolizes his deceiver. Sometimes, it happens that it is the anal-visual women who marry pathological cheaters, who constantly fall for the deception of fortune-tellers, soothsayers or psychics.

How to trust people in the modern world?

What to do? How to live and put up with the situation that there are so many deceivers around. And most importantly - how not to get caught, not to be deceived in people?

In fact, there is no answer to the question: how to trust people? Because to believe people, to think that they are all as kind, pure, truthful as we ourselves is wrong. This is a deliberately erroneous reasoning, which means that it will always end in disappointment. In this case, we will always get caught, we will always be deceived, and as a result, we will always become a victim of a deceiver.

No matter how sad it may sound, but today in our present situation it is almost impossible to change. There really are a lot of people around us who have deceived, are deceiving and will strive to deceive us. It is not worth expecting that the world will suddenly change and turn to us with a pleasant face. But to put up with the current situation is also not an option. Indeed, today there is a simple method for recognizing deceivers and scoundrels, which means that any deception and bitter disappointment in people and human values ​​can be prevented.