This amazing source will give you the greatest energy for a quick breakthrough to success and self-realization when you learn to control it with this method ...

Emotion is reaction systems on their assessment of the importance of the impact for self-realization. If the impact is harmful and hinders the achievement of the goal, then negative emotions arise. And if it is useful and allows or helps to achieve the goal, then positive emotions appear.

They can be called signals, notifying the system about a change in state in the past (memories), present (current situation) or future (imaginary situation). They motivate the system to work to maintain its integrity, development, success, harmony and self-realization.

Emotions, as basic motives, give the initial impulse, the impetus that takes the system out of the state rest(calm). They inspire, motivate, give energy to perform actions and change your state. They help to make decisions, overcome obstacles and act until the goal is achieved.

Depending on the content of the emotion, the system receives a different amount energy, impulse of different strength. As a rule, positive emotions give more energy and last longer than negative ones (joy, happiness, enthusiasm…). And negative emotions can completely deprive of energy, immobilize, paralyze (fear, confusion ...), which can worsen the condition, especially in the presence of danger.

Emotions can become values, which the system will seek to consciously experience (become happier, have fun, admire ...). Then they will begin to influence decisions, goals, actions and relationships. But each system has its own values, and an emotion that is valuable to one system may be completely indifferent to another.

For example, if happiness is a value for a person, then he can do anything in order to experience it. But another person may be indifferent to happiness, and do everything possible to feel, for example, surprise ...

Emotions make it possible to determine right decisions made regarding the values, purpose and talent of the system, which affects its self-realization. Negative emotions signal danger, deterioration and deviation from the path of self-realization. Positive emotions notify about the improvement of the state, the approach or achievement of the goal, the correct movement along the path of self-realization. Therefore, it is important to be aware of your emotions, process them, consciously regulate your activities when negative emotions or for the emergence of positive ones.

Much depends on the definition and expression of emotion. quality systems: charisma, authority, persuasiveness, openness… They most of all influence interaction, relationships and team building.

Only by consciously and actively using emotions can one become an influential leader. His value, authority and credibility are highly dependent on the emotions that he evokes in the entire team. Similarly, for a company, the more vivid, positive emotions it evokes among the team and customers, the more valuable it becomes.

Focusing emotions on relations and motivation of partners, you can get more resources from them and achieve more complex goals. Leaders who are sensitive to their own emotions and the emotions of team members create a more effective working and creative environment, which allows them to achieve greater success. Studies have shown that businessmen who are more emotional and attentive to other people's emotions earn more money.

It has been proven that in many cases emotions in more define thinking, activities and achievements than intellectual ability. Decisions can be made not on the basis of logical reasoning, rationality, justification and evidence, but on the basis of emotions that the expected result of this decision causes.

For example, a person choosing a new car may buy it not for its performance, reliability, safety, price/quality ratio… but for its color, comfortable seat, beautiful lighting in the cabin… that evoke positive emotions in him.

Emotions are closely related to way of thinking and imagination. If in a situation to pay attention to its harmful consequences, then negative emotions will arise, and vice versa. And if you imagine a good situation that leads to an improvement in your condition, then positive emotions will arise, and vice versa. Therefore, a person who manages his intellect, thinking and imagination well, it is easier to control his emotions, arousing some emotions in certain situations and suppressing others.

Emotions are very important to be able to recognize and evaluate teachers (teachers, lecturers, trainers ...) learning other people, especially children, because they are poorly aware of and manage their emotions.

Emotions and reactions of the student allow the teacher to choose the most appropriate, correct style of teaching and the content of the transmitted experience. This significantly affects the level trust between student and teacher. And trust affects the student's commitment to the teacher and faith in the truth of the experience transmitted by him. This is the main factor in whether the student will apply this experience in their activities or not, which is the main goal of the learning process.

Emergence of emotions

Every emotion must source- an external or internal stimulus that influenced the system and changed its state. These sources can be:
- material systems (things, objects, equipment, tools, people, animals, plants ...)
- mental images (thoughts, ideas, memories…)
- conditions, situations, circumstances in the environment
- rules, processes, principles, laws, norms...
- values ​​(freedom, harmony, comfort…)
- own state (facial expressions, body position, movements, voice ...)

The most common emotions arise in the following cases:

When perceived current conditions that have an important impact on the system and shape the experience.

At remembering situations that triggered emotions in the past. You can remember such a situation on your own, on purpose, or when you find yourself in a similar situation. Also, memories can arise when there are elements in the current situation that evoke associations with that situation. Moreover, emotions and internal processes can become similar to those that were experienced in the past situation: heart rate, breathing, pressure ...

When modeling the situation in imagination when you imagine conditions and processes that did not exist in reality, and evaluate their impact on your state.

5. Emotion management. Because emotions contain information about what happened, what is happening or a possible change in state, then they can be used in decision making. This will allow you to determine the most effective and successful way to achieve your goals. And by managing your own and other people's emotions, you can form a certain behavior that will help you act in the right direction.

Goleman's model includes the following EI abilities:

1. personal (internal):

- self-awareness- the ability to determine and identify one's state, emotions, personal resources, desires and goals;

- self-regulation- the ability to control and manage your emotions, with their help to change your personal state, make decisions and perform actions;

- motivation– emotional tension and concentration, helping to identify important goals and achieve them effectively;

2. social (external):

- empathy- awareness of the emotions and needs of other people, the ability to listen, and not just hear;

- social skills- the art of evoking a certain reaction in others, managing the relationships and emotions of other people, organizing effective interaction ...

This model is hierarchical, assuming that some abilities are based on others. For example, self-awareness is necessary for self-regulation - it is impossible to manage your emotions without being able to identify them. And knowing how to manage emotions, you can easily motivate yourself and quickly move into the right state ...

Development of emotional intelligence

This increases sensitivity to your own and others' emotions, allows you to manage them and motivate yourself to increase personal efficiency and success.

The development of emotional intelligence is based on the following principles:
expand your comfort zone, get into new conditions in which new emotions can arise, for example, visit new places, travel ...;
analyze and be aware of these new emotions as soon as they arise;
repeat situations in which emotions arise in order to better determine their impact on activity, one's reaction when they occur and try to manage them;
consciously stop negative emotions in known situations that cause them;
consciously excite emotions in ordinary situations in which these emotions did not arise;
determine the emotions of others. To do this, you can study how emotions are expressed (for example, study the book by P. Ekman, W. Friesen “Recognize a liar by facial expression”), or simply ask how a person feels when you assume that he has an emotion ...
arouse emotions in other people. For example, with the help of stories, anecdotes, metaphors... It is necessary to determine the correspondence between the impact and the emerging emotion, to consciously repeat this impact so that the same emotion appears in different people.

To effectively develop emotional intelligence, you can apply the following methods:

Education
At any age, in any field, at any time, it is important to continue your learning and self-learning. Moreover, the more expensive it is, the more professional and successful the teachers/coaches/mentors you learn from, the greater the impact this training will have on all areas of life and personal qualities, including EI. At the same time, it is first of all desirable to study general, humanitarian sciences (philosophy, psychology, natural science, biology ...) in order to better know the world and one's place in it, including gaining knowledge about emotional processes. And after realizing yourself, your talent and purpose, choose a narrow area of ​​development, your profession, corresponding to your vocation, and become a recognized expert in it.

Reading quality literature
For development in any field, it is extremely important to read books, practical guides, magazines, articles as much as possible... But even more important is to analyze and put into practice the information from them. It is also important to choose high-quality literature - popular, secular, news materials in the vast majority of cases do not affect development in any way, but only take time and clog memory. Books and manuals written by professionals, recognized experts, have a completely different effect: they provide important, verified information, allow you to form personal principles, behavior, goals, expand the paradigm, but most importantly, they motivate you to start acting. Therefore, for the development of EI, it is important to choose high-quality books, for example, Daniel Goleman "Emotional Intelligence".

Keeping a diary
Introspection is one of the main abilities of EI. And the materialization of thoughts during introspection of one's own and other people's emotions makes this process the most effective. In the diary, you can write down any situations that caused emotions, describe your feelings, identify and classify emotions, draw conclusions about how you could react in a similar situation next time. For convenient diary keeping, you can use the service Personal diaries.

Development of qualities
It is possible to improve individual components of EI - qualities described in EI models, such as self-awareness, self-regulation, empathy, etc. How to improve them is described in the method Development of personal qualities.

Trips
This is the most effective way to expand your comfort zone. you find yourself in a completely new environment, which you did not even imagine. And this can give the most powerful, vivid, new emotions that have never been heard of before. They can be learned to manage and use in the same, familiar conditions, which will give additional motivation, energy to perform ordinary tasks and achieve new goals. Travel can also lead to a change in the value system, which also changes emotions and their impact on activities. For example, having visited poor countries, you can begin to appreciate familiar things more: food, water, electricity, technology ..., get more pleasure from using them, start using them more rationally, more economically.

Flexibility
When making decisions, you can use not only your experience, your point of view, but also take into account the opinion of those who this decision may affect, seek compromises. This will avoid the emergence of negative emotions and, due to the environmental friendliness of the decision, can cause positive emotions for everyone who participated in its adoption and implementation. The opposite of this approach is called rigidity, when you act only on the basis of your experience. Then there is a high probability that the solution will not be environmentally friendly and will cause unpredictable harm.

Communication
Very often, emotions arise in ordinary communication. Communicating with new acquaintances or with old friends on new topics, you can experience new emotions. Evaluating and managing them during a conversation can significantly change its results. For example, during negotiations, if you flare up, you can lose potential customers or partners. And if the interlocutor evokes strong positive emotions, then you can get much more resources from him than expected, for example, more money from the sponsor.

Creation
Creating something new, unique guarantees positive emotions. And the creation of masterpieces, something that will be of interest, demand, for which others will thank - this is perhaps the main source of the most powerful, positive emotions that a person can experience in his life. The more grandiose creation you create, the more new and strong emotions arise.

Victories, awards, success
New emotions often arise when reaching goals, participating in competitions, training for them, or even ordinary arguments. And the moment of victory and receiving an award always excites strong positive emotions. And the more important the victory, the more difficult it was to achieve, the more resources spent on it and the greater the reward, the stronger emotions arise.

All these methods create emotional experience, which is the foundation for managing emotions. Without this experience, it is impossible to consciously excite or inhibit emotions. It creates a clear picture of what emotions can arise in response to certain changes, how they can affect state and activity, and what can be done to get rid of harmful emotions and arouse beneficial emotions.

The development of emotional intelligence makes it possible motivate and convince others at a deeper, more valuable level than can be done in words and deeds. This significantly improves relationships, which accelerates the achievement of common goals and self-realization.

The ideal development of EI leads to the appearance emotional competence- the ability to recognize and manage any, even unknown emotions in any conditions. It allows you to determine the impact on the activity of new emotions, not experienced before, even if you have never heard of them, and manage them. It also allows you to control emotions of any, even the highest intensity, reduce or increase it to the desired level. It is also a protective barrier that prevents it from "exploding" and causing harm.

To determine the current level of development of your EI, you can use the following tests - the redemption of harmful emotions, i.e. transition from an active to a calm state;
- change in the intensity of emotion.

These processes also apply to the system itself, i.e. management of personal emotions, and to other systems, i.e. managing other people's emotions.

Effective management of emotions is possible only when realize them, you can consciously determine the moment of their occurrence and correctly identify them. To do this, it is necessary to accumulate emotional experience, repeatedly find yourself in situations that excite a certain emotion. Without this, management can lead to an inadequate change in their intensity (for example, they wanted to extinguish an emotion, but on the contrary it intensified), it can be completely useless or even harmful.

plays an important role in managing emotions imagination. The better it is developed, the more realistic and large-scale images and situations it can create, in which emotions will be most vivid and intense. You can improve your imagination with the help of imagination training.

It also influences the management of emotions memory. The better it is developed and the more emotional experience it has, the more vivid memories you can get from it. You can improve your memory with memory training.

Because emotions are closely related to will, then the stronger it is, the easier it is to control emotions. Therefore, one way to manage emotions is to develop will, perseverance and self-discipline. You can improve them using the Self-Discipline Training method.

When managing emotions, it is important to adhere to the following principles:

If at the moment you are experiencing one emotion and want to excite another, then you must first to repay the current one, going into a calm state, and only after that excite the necessary one.

It is necessary to consciously manage their external expression: facial expressions, movements of the arms, legs, body as a whole, its position, gestures, voice ... For example, in order for joy to arise, it is usually enough just to smile. To extinguish anger, you can freeze, sigh and make a normal, calm expression on your face.

For excitement emotions need stimuli. They can be obtained through the following channels:

- visual: see the source of emotions (for example, a beautiful landscape), imagine it, go to certain conditions, situations, watch a movie, a picture ...;

- auditory: other people's and their own words, thoughts (inner voice), voice volume, speech rate, music, sounds ...;

- kinesthetic: facial expressions, movements and body position, gestures, breathing ...

congruent, the coordinated use of all these channels simultaneously allows you to most quickly excite even the most strong emotion. Moreover, for maximum efficiency, it is recommended to use them in the same sequence: visual (draw a picture in the mind), auditory (add words, music ...) and then kinesthetic (make an appropriate facial expression, take a certain pose ...)

For example, you can simultaneously imagine or remember a situation in which you experienced joy, turn on joyful music, say “I am fun, joyful, cool” and actively dance, then you can experience very strong joy, perhaps even delight.

But if, using all channels, one of them, for example, kinesthetic, will controversial emotion (not congruent), then the general state may not change or even become the opposite of what is desired.

For example, if you want to experience joy, imagine a picture, listen to music, but the body is very lethargic, the facial expression is sad, sad or even angry, then negative emotions may arise, not positive ones.

Thus, in order to arouse a certain emotion, one can recall the situation in which it arose in the past. Remember the details of what surrounded you, what actions you performed, what words and sounds you heard, what you felt in your body, what thoughts you had... If there is no experience of experiencing the necessary emotion or it is forgotten, then the emotion cannot be aroused in this way. Then you can consciously create the conditions in which this emotion can arise, and get the missing emotional experience.

Also, to arouse a certain emotion, you can introduce a visual image (picture) of a situation in which this emotion could arise in reality. In the absence of emotional experience, it is difficult to determine in which imaginary situation which emotion will arise. Then you need to accumulate this experience - move into new conditions, participate in new situations that can give new emotions. Having gained such experience, it will be possible to identify the basic elements of conditions and situations that arouse a certain emotion, and use them in the imagination.

For example, if in many situations when joy arose, a certain person was present or a certain resource was received, then similar elements can be used in an imaginary situation and the emotion will arise again.

For excitation of other people's emotions, you need to make sure that these same channels start working for another person. For example, so that he remembers a situation or presents it. To do this, you can use open-ended questions, stories or metaphors that will create a certain image in the mind of a person or evoke memories.

For example, in order for a person to experience joy, you can ask him: “What was your happiest day in your life?”. Or you can say: “Do you remember when you first found yourself at sea, remember how happy you were then ...”. Or: “And imagine that you are in the most heavenly place on earth, next to you are the people closest to you ... How would you feel then?” Then the person will immediately have images and memories that will cause emotions.

To to repay emotion, you need to go into a calm state using the following methods:
- relax, stop moving, sit or lie down comfortably;
- focus on your breathing, start breathing more slowly and deeply, hold it for a few seconds after inhaling ...;
- change the voice, reduce its volume, speak more slowly or stop speaking altogether for a short period;
- imagine or recall a situation in which you experience maximum safety, comfort, coziness, warmth.

To extinguish other people's emotions, you can be asked to perform these actions (in no case be forced, unless of course it came to an affect with harmful consequences). For example, you can say in a calm voice: "Calm down, take a deep breath, sit down, drink water ...". If a person does not want to calm down, then you can try to switch his attention. For example, again, you can tell a story, a metaphor, ask an open question...

To learn how to change intensity specific emotion, you can apply the following method:

1. Completely realize this emotion, to identify, classify, determine the sensations that it causes in the body, what actions it motivates, determine its sources, remember the situations in which it arose, or be in such a situation in order to vividly experience it. This will require an emotional experience.

2. I use scale from 1 to 100%, imagine what this emotion would be at maximum intensity (by 100%). Imagine what sensations would be in the body, what actions you would like to perform, how intensely to act ...

3. Determine current level that emotion is currently on the scale.

4. Moving small steps(by 5-10%) up this scale, change the intensity of that emotion in the body. To do this, you can simply imagine how the value on the scale increases and its intensity increases. Or you can imagine/remember situations in which this emotion was more intense. It is important that the changes are felt in the body, the activity changes. If there are difficulties in the transition to a higher intensity, then you can reduce the step, for example, increase the intensity by 2-3%.

5. Having reached maximum intensity, you need to start reducing the intensity to 0 using a step of 5-10%. To do this, you can also imagine moving down the scale or imagine/remember situations with less intensity of this emotion.

6. Then you need to reach 100% again, then again to 0% ... And continue this process until you get fast change the intensity of the emotion with its actual expression in the body.

7. To consolidate the skill, you can go to certain intensity, for example, by 27%, by 64%, by 81%, by 42%... The main thing is to have a clear feeling of emotion in the body.

For mood management it is enough to know their causes and take measures to eliminate them (to get rid of a bad mood) or create them (to make the mood good). These reasons usually include:

- internal processes and state: sickly or healthy, alert or drowsy ...

For example, having Bad mood, you can find out that you are sick. Then, to cheer up, it will be enough to take medicine, go to the doctor ... and be cured.

- environment : comfort or disorder, noise or silence, fresh air or unpleasant smells, pleasant or annoying people...

For example, if the workplace is a mess, discomfort, then there may be a bad mood. Then you can clean up, bring beauty and cleanliness.

- relationship: the mood of other people is transmitted to the person.

For example, if you met a friend and had a pleasant conversation with him, then the mood improves. And if you met a person with an evil expression on his face, who also got nasty from scratch, then the mood may worsen. Then you can just stop contact with such a person and chat with someone who is pleasant.

- thoughts and images: By remembering or imagining situations, they evoke corresponding emotions. Therefore, to improve mood, you can imagine or recall an incident that caused positive emotions.

For example, remember a funny incident or a happy moment in your life. Or imagine a trip in a beautiful car that you have long dreamed of. Or, for example, an athlete, thinking before the competition about possible injuries, defeat, etc., will have a bad mood. Then you can think about winning, rewarding, etc., so that your mood improves.

- desires and goals: reaching an important goal, the mood can be good, and if there are unresolved problems, then it can worsen.

For example, to cheer you up, you can set yourself a goal that you really want to achieve. Or you can solve a long-standing problem that caused discomfort or prevented you from moving towards your desired goal.

Another significant advantage of managing emotions is success in all areas of life. Indeed, in this case, there is no harm at all with strong emotional "outbursts" and there is always energy to achieve any goal.

In any case, even if emotions are not used for development and self-realization, they are still necessary for ordinary life to be in a good mood, tone, be happy, experience joy even from the smallest things and share your emotions with loved ones.

Develop your emotions and manage them, then your success, your happiness and your self-realization will be inevitable.

Everyone likes positive people - people who are hard to anger even in the most difficult life situations, people with whom communication is easy and relaxed. But even in the most calm and non-conflict persons, negative emotions can arise that are not easy to ignore and suppress.

Sometimes even if a person wants to be positive, there are cases in which it is very difficult to restrain your negative emotions, because usually there are plenty of people who want to spoil your mood.

However, positive emotions can be made central to your subconscious mind by refusing negative feelings in one way or another.

In order for positive emotions to prevail over negative ones, you yourself must want to be more positive, making your own steps towards peace and tranquility for this.

There are a lot of all kinds of trainings that can quite simply evoke positive emotions in a person, maintaining such positive emotions for a long time. Quite a simple, but quite effective training with a purple bracelet. The essence of the training is that a purple bracelet is put on one hand, and if a person begins to feel anger, resentment, negativity, irritation, the purple accessory is transferred to the other hand. The goal of the training is to subconsciously replace the negative with positive emotions, having lived for 21 days so as not to shift the jewelry.

For some, this training may smack of primitivism, because it is hard to believe that a person with the help of an ordinary bracelet can subconsciously set himself up for positive emotions. The danger of this procedure is that a psychologically weak person may not cope with negative feelings on his own, causing even more dangerous internal conflicts.

To prevent this from happening, a person himself must set himself up for positive emotions, realizing simple truths, the understanding of which will ensure the attraction of positive and success in all matters.

And yet, how to set yourself up for positive emotions, and start thinking positively ...

Firstly, if you start thinking positively, all the people around you will subconsciously notice this. Positive emotions will help you achieve your goals, accept failures with dignity, perceiving them not as a hit, but as a useful life lesson.

If this happened, then we did something wrong. If our friends and relatives turned away from us, then our actions were wrong in their understanding.

Remember the positive emotions that you had in your life.

Although many people say that you don’t need to remember the past, on the contrary, if you remember the good things that happened to you in the past, you will receive additional arguments that positive emotions can be in your life, that you can think and perceive life with a positive .

Avoid negative information

Today, in the media, on TV, on the Internet, you can read and see so much bad and negative things that you start to think about how hard, bad, negative our life is. Do not let this kind of information reach you, drive it away from you, thereby protecting your brain from negativity.

Hang out and befriend positive people.

Positive emotions will become habitual for you if you communicate and make friends with positive people. Such people will help you forget about the negative, and perceive the world easier.

Read books, watch movies, listen to music in a positive way.

The positive emotions we received through books, music and TV shows have a very good effect on the subconscious of a person, charging him with energy and good mood for a long time.

Remember, when you hear a song that you like, you immediately switch to its perception, leaving everything else aside.

Work should bring not only money, but also pleasure.

Achieve this in modern world, perhaps, although not so easy, because we can not always find a job that would be to our liking, and even bring money.

However, if you do find such a job, you will not even notice how much your life will begin to change. After all, what you do with a positive, will surely give the same positive result.

Do not remain indifferent to the problems of others, and then luck will not leave you.

There are people who do not live richly, but believe that helping people is the most great happiness in life. For some, these words may seem pretentious, but you can’t even imagine how unusual you will feel when your actions help someone out of a difficult life situation. You will feel a lot of positive when you know that your help for someone has become a lifeline. Positive emotions will be provided for your good deed.

Smile and positive emotions will follow you.

A smiling person attracts with positive. Smile and people will be drawn to you. When a person smiles, he gives his positive to others. Get up and go to bed with a smile, smile and laugh as often as possible.

Don't forget about a healthy lifestyle.

If you reconsider you are full of negativity and everything is bad for you, reconsider your lifestyle - maybe you are doing something wrong. Exercise and rest so that the body has time to regenerate.

Eat healthy food, because it is the wrong diet that can cause a bad mood.

Take care of yourself to the fullest. Analyze your day and think about what to do to make it better.

Self-tuning is one way to make positive emotions mainstream.

Like the purple bracelet training and others, these trainings and exercises can help remove negativity from your life. Come up with your own method of self-tuning. Always imagine what you want the most.

If suddenly you have bad thoughts again, pinch yourself. So subconsciously you set yourself up to avoid negative emotions. Again, simple but effective. Drive depression away. May it not be in your life.

It may be that no matter how much you want, you will not be able to drive the negative out of your life, replacing it with positive emotions, on your own.

Then we advise you to contact a specialist. The mentality of our people does not yet allow us to correctly perceive the word "psychologist". However, do not be afraid to consult with a person who knows everything about such problems, who can direct your thoughts in the right direction, suggesting what to do so that positive emotions begin to prevail over negativity.