The guy doesn't show feelings. Loves-does not love ... Psychology of a man in love

All women want to be loved. And loved so that it was not just a hobby on the part of the stronger sex, but real male love. And each of us secretly dreams of such love as described by Mikhail Bulgakov in his novel The Master and Margarita. Namely, so that "love jumped out in front of us, like a killer jumps out of the ground in an alley, and hit us both at once! This is how lightning strikes, this is how a Finnish knife strikes!" And that's it. And in the relationship of the two, everything immediately became clear and understandable, and the lovers can only enjoy their happiness.

However, in reality, such cases are rare. It often happens that quite a long time passes after meeting, and the true manifestations of male love are not visible. No, he can say kind words to his girlfriend, give her flowers, be very gentle in bed, call regularly and so on. But - that's all. And nothing more. And the woman in love begins to be tormented by the question: "But how does he really feel about me?"

Asking a man about it in the forehead in this case is useless. Representatives of the strong half of humanity answer such a question with all frankness only sometimes. And not because they are pathological liars. Simply because male psychology in love is very different from female psychology, therefore, the behavior of a man in love is such that sincere confessions are very difficult for him. Some of them find it much more difficult to tell the truth about their feelings than to lie.

So what about a woman? Continue month after month to hope for the seriousness of the feelings of a man in love? And if these relationships are superficial? Break up with your current friend? And if he really feels real male love for her, but is silent due to the fact that such is the psychology of men in love?

Dilemma. And time goes by, a woman becomes more and more attached to her lover, and the question of the seriousness of the relationship becomes more and more painful. What if all this is temporary, and one day he does not come, does not call, and then completely disappears forever? Who knows how to understand it, in this very psychology of a man in love? And, in general, she would have insisted on a frank answer. But he is afraid to scare him away with his perseverance ... What to do? The answer is simple. In reality, there are quite a lot of manifestations of male love, and if you notice them in the behavior of a man, you can be relatively calm - he really loves. But first, of course, you need to know what these manifestations are and what are the behavioral features of a truly enamored man.

How does a man's love manifest itself?

In the subtle art of relationships, of course, women are rightfully considered unsurpassed masters- they are unpredictable, mysterious, and often their behavior defies any logical analysis. And therefore, there is an opinion that men in this regard are much clearer and simpler, that there is nothing complicated in the psychology of men in love, and that their behavior is no secret for women.

In fact, this is far from the case. Just in male psychology there is a lot of obscurity in love even to specialists in this matter. One of the representatives of the stronger sex, falling in love, begins to go crazy, begins to pursue his beloved at every turn, sing serenades, fall asleep with expensive gifts ... And then completely cools down to the object of passion and stops noticing it. Someone, having fallen in love, hides, behaves very carefully towards the woman he loves, diligently putting on a dismissive or abstract look. And such a situation, when not a single gesture and not a single word betrays a man in love, can last for years.

Both behaviors can be both a true manifestation of a man's love for a woman, and an expression of a temporary, albeit rather long, hobby. In a word, if the masculine gender were predictable, then women would not be tormented by doubt and uncertainty, not knowing how to interpret the psychology of men in love.

But time passes, everything changes. And our parents, if they are not hardened conservatives, are no longer surprised by the freedom in relations between a man and a woman. Advanced mothers and fathers today are quite calm about the fact that even in a short time, the daughter may change several potential candidates for husbands, and the son - his "only and forever beloved."

In addition, over time, the age of maturation of men has also increased significantly. If earlier the guys demobilized from the army were already real men, ready to start a family and raise children, today young people under the age of thirty are still considered young men who are not in a hurry to consciously acquire offspring. And here, too, sometimes such signs of male love as the acquaintance of a girl with her mother do not play any role. Because in fact, this is not his desire, but his mother’s desire to find out who her son is dating now in order to calm down or, conversely, get upset and dissuade him from a rash step in time.

So how do we know if he loves or doesn't love? How does the psychology of male love manifest itself in reality? Some women believe that you can test a man by touching on the topic of how many children they will have and what they will name them. And if a man maintains such a conversation, the woman concludes that he is interested in it and he also dreams of life together. However, this is by no means a confirmation of true male love - sometimes conversations remain conversations. And the woman does not even realize that the man does not interrupt her and supports the topic only in order to maintain his own calmness.

Conclusion: again doubts, doubts, doubts. "Yes, how can a man's love manifest itself today at least in something ?!" We say in desperation! Yes, he gives flowers and various little things, yes, he introduced me to his parents, yes, he talks about our joint children and even claims that he loves! But that's all! Time is running and nothing changes anymore. And girlfriends are already sarcastically laughing and giving examples of how men leave their girlfriends after a long relationship. What to do, what to do?! How to find the features of a person in love in your man if he is really in love?

Let's calm down. There are indicators of true male love, and they are obvious. It’s just that we haven’t paid attention to them yet, because we didn’t know that these facts indicate the seriousness of the lover’s intentions. So what are these indicators?

Signs of male love

1. If a man decides to part with his position as a bachelor, then with all his behavior he will demonstrate an internal identification with a woman - such is the psychology of men in love. In his conversation with her and with other people, more and more often, instead of the word "I" the word "we" will sound. This is the subconscious perception of oneself not as a separate person, but as a person in a pair.

2. Men are very honest with themselves: if a woman is not his true male love, then he will not spend much time on her. He will most likely spend his free hours with friends in the company, spend it on sports, fishing, some of his hobbies, and even on an extra two hours of sleep. Very rarely, men devote the bulk of their leisure time to unpromising, from their point of view, relationships. Therefore, in order to draw a conclusion about the quality of the relationship, you need to pay attention to the amount of time spent together.

3. These manifestations of male love are a logical continuation of the previous sign of a man in love. If a man prefers communication with a woman more than communication with other people, she can be calm - she is loved. Prioritizing communication will say more than all the words about love, which may not be true. A stable trend is very important here. In the event that a man just once or twice for the sake of a woman refused to meet with a second cousin or a neighbor in the garden (garage), this does not yet indicate his strong affection.

4. This indicator seems insignificant, but it is quite significant. If a man does not treat a woman lightly, then he will certainly give her his favorite toy at least for temporary use. Of course, such toys of an adult man are not wooden horses or constructors from childhood. For our men, toys are almost all (including technically complex) devices, from watches to computers and cars. They do not like to share their favorite toys with strangers. And they allow only those to whom they have a special disposition to use them.

5. Oddly enough, but the first serious quarrel is also one of the signs of male love. These are the features of the psychology of men: they do not waste time, energy and nerves on a real quarrel with a woman if they do not plan to be with her for as long as possible. With women who do not cause much interest, men behave differently. If a conflict is brewing, they simply turn around and leave, not allowing the showdown to continue. Of course, with a major quarrel, you can be sure of the seriousness of the man’s intentions only if it ended in reconciliation. In some cases, the representatives of the stronger sex themselves provoke a scandal in order to part with a woman.

6. Perhaps the most significant indicator of a man's love is when he introduces a woman to his friends. Such an acquaintance is often much more important than even introducing the chosen one to the parents. Friends are often part of a man's most consecrated society and are in some way a kind of association in which he can allow himself to be himself. And not every woman is honored with an invitation to this closed world. And if she was already invited there, then this means that the opinion and support of his friends regarding his choice is important for a man. In addition, meeting friends indicates trust in the woman herself.

7. A very good indicator that true male love really settled in the heart of a lover is Team work initiated by a man. "Joint work unites," the cat Matroskin said wisely. Indeed, a common cause brings people together. Preferably not a professional one. labor activity, but, for example, a trip to the forest for mushrooms, harvesting in the country, cleaning the garage, and so on. From the point of view of psychologists, when a man and a woman do something together in everyday life, the following happens: in the male subconscious, information is firmly settled that this woman can not only have fun in life, but also help get daily bread.

8. If a man himself begins not only to talk about a joint future, but also takes concrete steps in this direction, then a woman can be congratulated. This is the main sign of a seriously in love man. He has already decided everything in favor of family life, and now he is starting to act actively. Psychologists advise to always evaluate the attitude of a man towards a woman by his actions. After all, it is much easier to pronounce words than to carry out a specific task or take responsibility for solving some problems that a woman has.

Giving a gallant hand, opening a door in front of a lady or paying for it in a restaurant is not difficult. And, in fact, such behavior is nothing more than polite courtesy, which should not be given much importance. But if a man helped with the move from a rented apartment, started doing repairs in a new one, repaired a faucet in an old one, and so on, this is already a real act of the future husband.

So, the psychology of men in love has already become more understandable to us, and we already know several signs that the chosen one takes us seriously. And we begin to analyze his actions, based on these signs. Of course, the presence of even all these signs cannot give a 100% guarantee of a man's decisive intentions, ending with a trip to the registry office - anything can happen in life.

It also happens that a truly in love man, who has already offered his hand and heart to his chosen one, suddenly changes his mind at the last moment. It is very expensive, this notorious male freedom! Therefore, you should not artificially limit it and rush things. Let the beloved come to the decision we need himself.

This will give the woman the opportunity to feel free in marriage herself. After all, there is nothing worse than realizing every day that, perhaps, the current spouse created a family under pressure from outside. But to know for sure that the person you love sincerely and deeply loves you is real happiness!

Under the concept of "love" every woman understands different things, but speaking of How does a man show love?, they certainly mean some specific actions on his part. Many are sure that a man can convince a woman of his love only by demonstrating his feelings with the help of beautiful gestures and courtship. In most cases on initial stage relationships, this is exactly how everything happens: men give women gifts, invite them to movies or restaurants, call them several times a day, make compliments and try in every way to do something pleasant for them.

However, over time, when the relationship becomes more serious, they stop paying as much attention to their partner as at the beginning, and women worry because of this, because they think that the man has become colder towards her or even completely out of love. In fact, men simply do not like a frank demonstration of feelings at all, therefore, with the development of relationships, they stop flaunting them, believing that a woman will understand everything anyway. Experienced women are well aware that there are some signs by which they can always recognize the true feelings that a man really experiences.

Sexual and mental attraction

The most important sign of how a man shows love for a woman is the sexual attraction that he feels for her. If a woman is not an attractive partner for a man, he will never be able to build with her. harmonious relations and love her. Indeed, by nature, men are hunters, but their attraction may well be temporary and cannot be considered a guaranteed sign of love.

Rather indicative in this case is the behavior of a man at a time when sexual intimacy has already taken place. If initially he looked at the woman as another adventure, then in most cases he loses interest in her after the end of contact. The situation when, after sex, he begins to behave even more interested, may indicate that he has serious feelings.

If there is spiritual closeness between a man and a woman, that is, he is looking for contact and communication with her, trying to spend as much time together as possible, then this clearly indicates that she is far from being indifferent to him. Men demonstrate this in different ways: some try to call their beloved often, others spend almost everything with her. free time, and still others prefer to show their feelings in a tactile form, but whatever form your man chooses, he is definitely interested in you not only as a partner for sex, but also as an interlocutor or even a friend.

A man lets you close to his life

How a man shows love can depend on a variety of circumstances, but if he easily lets you into his life, it means that he really loves you. After all, men are conservative and often women's attempts to take a closer part in their lives are perceived as a restriction of their freedom. If you notice that a man is trying to involve a woman in his life himself: he offers to live together, introduces relatives and close friends, or asks to spend more time with him, this clearly indicates that he is in love with her. On the contrary, you should not even think about it if he hides his past or present from a woman, does not allow her to participate in his affairs and hides the relationship that has arisen between them.

If a man really values your relationship, he is well aware that certain concessions will be required from him. In this case, he readily gives up any habits or allows you to bring something new into his life, and this can serve as sufficient proof of his love for you. However, do not abuse it too much: frequent establishment of your own rules and active interference in his life can offend your man, which will certainly make him reconsider his attitude towards you once again.

Does a man care about you

The most obvious from the list of how a man shows love is his concern for a woman. If you notice that he is trying to predict your desires or pleasantly surprise you, and if he succeeds, he is sincerely happy, then this may well mean that he is completely sincere in his feelings for you. To women who are indifferent to him, he almost does not show feelings.

Please note that a man who shows sincere love for you is unlikely to think about how much money he spent on it, because with the help of gifts he can show you his true feelings. It is not at all necessary that a man gives you chic bouquets of roses every day, because sometimes small and inexpensive, but very useful gifts speak of his love much more eloquently.

It should be remembered that a man in love usually seeks to protect a woman from danger and not cause her the slightest harm. A man will not hurt a woman if he has sincere feelings for her and we are talking not only about cruelty and the use of physical force: in the actions of a man in love there is no place for insults, humiliation, rudeness and psychological pressure.

What contributes to the formation strong relationship? What are the signs that a man is serious about you? After reading this article, you will find the answers to these questions.

Here are 10 signs true love men.

1) You are on the same wavelength

Although differences in personality and hobbies add variety to relationships, in order for them to last long, it is necessary to have something in common with a partner.

Similarity in lifestyle, ways of thinking, outlook on life, all this is necessary for a relationship to be strong. You can have different hobbies and it won't hurt the relationship at all, but if you have differences in these fundamental things, then the relationship is unlikely to last.

Such an opinion may seem biased, but it is a fact. Even a big age difference will not be such a hindrance as, for example, a mismatch in lifestyle.

2) He takes part in your life

Even if it's not always good to do absolutely everything together, your lover should be yours. best friend. When you are aware of all the important matters of the second half, this means mutual trust and interest in each other.

Partners who have established mutual understanding are not bored together. Otherwise, even if at first you were in love, fatigue and boredom can alienate you from each other and cause a break or betrayal.

If your man does not show any participation in your life, then most likely your relationship is based only on physical attraction and will not develop into something serious.

3) Feeling of trust and security

Love has an insidious and vindictive enemy - jealousy. One of the signs of true love is trust and a sense of security. If you trust each other and remain faithful, this will help you avoid difficult situations and painful showdowns.

4) Everything is fine in bed

Sex is a very important factor in a relationship as it is a moment of intimacy, physical enjoyment and shared love. Therefore, success in a sexual life is just as important for long-term relationships as mutual understanding.

Sexual compatibility is an indicator of a couple's health. If a week to a month has passed since your first night, and something is already not going well in bed, then most likely you will not make a good couple.

If, on the contrary, everything is fine in your sexual life, if there is mutual understanding, you may well become one of those couples who live together all their lives.

5) He introduced you to family and friends

When it comes to serious relationships, a man feels the need to introduce his partner to the people he loves: family and friends. This means that he expects to develop your relationship further.

Keep in mind that there are exceptions to this rule.

Some men present their new partners to their loved ones as a trophy, and not as a mother of future children. In other cases, your lover may simply be ashamed of his family and just delay getting to know her as much as possible. If you find yourself in one of these two situations, you will quickly feel it.

6) You are in his plans for the future

It seems obvious, but given the importance of this sign, it is worth mentioning: if a man makes plans for the future, taking into account you, then this means that he loves you and views the relationship as something important and permanent.

Plans may include a visit to the museum next week, a vacation in two months, or even a shared apartment. It is not so important what it is, the main thing is that it concerns both of you.

If your partner is planning only your next date, then he does not take you seriously, and you should look for someone to whom you will be more important.

7) He appreciates and admires you

The ability to appreciate and admire each other is one of the most important moments in a relationship. If even after years you still admire your soul mate, the romance of your relationship will be endless.

8) He is comfortable around

In fact, it is quite difficult to find a person who, being constantly next to you, does not cause any irritation and discomfort. If you are comfortable and calm with your man, and he is with you, this is one of the signs of true love. After all, when you are close to a loved one, you do not need to play a role and pretend - you can just be yourself.

9) He is interested in you

You and your loved one have common interests and topics for conversation. Communication is very important in a long-term relationship. If your discussions are interesting for both and you can learn something new from them, then your love is really real.

10) You feel that he is in love with you

If you love someone, then you cannot imagine your life without this person and, therefore, you are planning a serious relationship with him.

Here are the signs that he is in love:

He looks at you like you are beautiful girl of everyone he saw.
He devotes a lot of time to you and is always there when you need him.
He cares about your mood and your well-being.

Let's take a look at the signs of true love. If you find them, then your man is serious about you. If all of the above matches what is going on in your relationship, then you are very lucky. But even if at the moment something is not going well between you, do not be discouraged, very soon everything can change for the better.

All women want to be loved. And loved so that it was not just a hobby on the part of the stronger sex, but real male love. And each of us secretly dreams of such love, as described by Mikhail Bulgakov in his novel The Master and Margarita. Namely, so that “love jumps out in front of us, like a killer jumps out of the ground in an alley, and hit us both at once! This is how lightning strikes, this is how a Finnish knife strikes! And that's it. And in the relationship of the two, everything immediately became clear and understandable, and the lovers can only enjoy their happiness.

Asking a man about it in the forehead in this case is useless. Representatives of the strong half of humanity answer such a question with all frankness only sometimes. And not because they are pathological liars. Just because the male psychology in love is very different from the female one, therefore the behavior of a man in love is such that sincere confessions are very difficult for him. Some of them find it much more difficult to tell the truth about their feelings than to lie.

How does a man's love manifest itself?

In the subtle art of relationships, of course, women are rightfully considered unsurpassed masters - they are unpredictable, mysterious, and often their behavior defies any logical analysis. And therefore, there is an opinion that men in this regard are much clearer and simpler, that there is nothing complicated in the psychology of men in love, and that their behavior is no secret for women.

In fact, this is far from the case. Just in male psychology in love, there is a lot that is unclear even to specialists in this matter. One of the representatives of the stronger sex, falling in love, begins to go crazy, begins to pursue his beloved at every turn, sing serenades, fall asleep with expensive gifts ... And then completely cools down to the object of passion and stops noticing it. Someone, having fallen in love, hides, behaves very carefully towards the woman he loves, diligently putting on a dismissive or abstract look. And such a situation, when not a single gesture and not a single word betrays a man in love, can last for years.

A few decades ago, one of the most powerful arguments for confirming a true man's love for a woman was meeting his parents. And the ceremony of acquaintance itself was already implied as a small step to the door of a joint house and to the beginning of family life.
But time passes, everything changes. And our parents, if they are not hardened conservatives, are no longer surprised by the freedom in relations between a man and a woman. Advanced mothers and fathers today are quite calm about the fact that even in a short time, the daughter can change several potential candidates for husbands, and the son has his “only and forever beloved”.

So how do we know if he loves or doesn't love? How does the psychology of male love manifest itself in reality? Some women believe that you can test a man by touching on the topic of how many children they will have and what they will name them. And if a man maintains such a conversation, the woman concludes that he is interested in it and he also dreams of living together. However, this is by no means a confirmation of true male love - sometimes conversations remain conversations. And the woman does not even realize that the man does not interrupt her and supports the topic only in order to maintain his own calmness.

Conclusion: again doubts, doubts, doubts. “Yes, how can male love manifest itself today in at least something ?!” We say in desperation! Yes, he gives flowers and various little things, yes, he introduced me to his parents, yes, he talks about our joint children and even claims that he loves! But that's all! Time goes by and nothing changes anymore. And girlfriends are already sarcastically laughing and giving examples of how men leave their girlfriends after a long relationship. What to do, what to do?! How to find the features of a person in love in your man if he is really in love?

Signs of male love

First. If a man decides to part with his position as a bachelor, then with all his behavior he will demonstrate an internal identification with a woman - such is the psychology of men in love. In his conversation with her and with other people, more and more often, instead of the word “I”, the word “we” will sound. This is the subconscious perception of oneself not as a separate person, but as a person in a pair.

Second. Men are very honest with themselves: if a woman is not his true male love, then he will not spend much time on her. He will most likely spend his free hours with friends in the company, spend it on sports, fishing, some of his hobbies, and even on an extra two hours of sleep. Very rarely, men devote the bulk of their leisure time to unpromising, from their point of view, relationships. Therefore, in order to draw a conclusion about the quality of the relationship, you need to pay attention to the amount of time spent together.

Third. These manifestations of male love are a logical continuation of the previous sign of a man in love. If a man prefers communication with a woman more than communication with other people, she can be calm - she is loved. Prioritizing communication will say more than all the words about love, which may not be true. A stable trend is very important here. In the event that a man just once or twice for the sake of a woman refused to meet with a second cousin or a neighbor in the garden (garage), this does not yet indicate his strong affection.

Fourth. This indicator seems insignificant, but it is quite significant. If a man does not treat a woman lightly, then he will certainly give her his favorite toy at least for temporary use. Of course, such toys of an adult man are not wooden horses or constructors from childhood. For our men, toys are almost all (including technically complex) devices, from watches to computers and cars. They do not like to share their favorite toys with strangers. And they allow only those to whom they have a special disposition to use them.

Fifth. Oddly enough, but the first serious quarrel is also one of the signs of male love. These are the features of the psychology of men: they do not waste time, energy and nerves on a real quarrel with a woman if they do not plan to be with her for as long as possible. With women who do not cause much interest, men behave differently. If a conflict is brewing, they simply turn around and leave, not allowing the showdown to continue. Of course, with a major quarrel, you can be sure of the seriousness of the man’s intentions only if it ended in reconciliation. In some cases, the representatives of the stronger sex themselves provoke a scandal in order to part with a woman.

Sixth. Perhaps the most significant indicator of a man's love is when he introduces a woman to his friends. Such an acquaintance is often much more important than even introducing the chosen one to the parents. Friends are often part of a man's most consecrated society and are in some way a kind of association in which he can allow himself to be himself. And not every woman is honored with an invitation to this closed world. And if she was already invited there, then this means that the opinion and support of his friends regarding his choice is important for a man. In addition, meeting friends indicates trust in the woman herself.

Seventh. A very good indicator that true male love has really settled in the heart of a lover is a joint activity initiated by a man. “Joint work unites,” Matroskin the cat said wisely. Indeed, a common cause brings people together. It is desirable that this is not a professional labor activity, but, for example, a trip to the forest for mushrooms, harvesting in the country, cleaning the garage, and so on. From the point of view of psychologists, when a man and a woman do something together in everyday life, the following happens: in the male subconscious, information is firmly settled that this woman can not only have fun in life, but also help get daily bread.

Eight sign. If a man himself begins not only to talk about a joint future, but also takes concrete steps in this direction, then a woman can be congratulated. This is the main sign of a seriously in love man. He has already decided everything in favor of family life, and now he is starting to act actively. Psychologists advise to always evaluate the attitude of a man towards a woman by his actions. After all, it is much easier to pronounce words than to carry out a specific task or take responsibility for solving some problems that a woman has.